From an atheist perspective, Santa is basically the little-kid version of Jesus.
He has most of the same attributes, and people believe in them for largely the same reasons.
It makes the whole thing very… I don’t know… weird?
MIL had a Tinkerbell ornament that was used through out the year as a “where’s Tinkerbell” activity for the grandkids when they were younger
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One of the grandkids was worried one time that Tinkerbell was sick when she didn’t move
Here is how Mrs. VA and I handled “Santa”:
“Santa” represents giving anonymously (as parents). So when the kids find out who is really behind Santa, we explained what the point was: the fact that they got something from someone who they really don’t know made them feel very good. The main focus is the idea of giving without getting (direct) recognition–something that is very abstract made a bit more concrete to a young mind. That is, they can always “play Santa” in giving something (useful) to another and not expect the get recognition for it.
And we did not promote “better be good or Santa might not visit”. We reinforced expected behavior year-round and Xmas was no different. We also subscribed to “first time obedience” where our kids were expected to comply on the first request. That is, we never “counted” to have obedience begin. If we counted, it was for completion of a task, not for the task to get started.
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does stopping lying to my kids include:
that unicorns don’t exist
that animals can’t really talk
that the hamburger they ate was raised then slaughtered
that we’re all going to die
that everything dies eventually
that life is meaningless
Kids understand make believe imo
Santa is glamorous. Jesus looks like a street rat. I want my idols to look GLAM
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That sounds great except how do you explain the naughty and nice thing? Do you donate coal if the malaria stricken children aren’t well behaved?
In fairness I see you say you didn’t do this part
now you’re lying to us!
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My parents never did the naughty or nice thing, either. I think that’s creepy.
We did tell our kids that if they didn’t believe in the tooth fairy, she might stop believing in them. But that was a joke.
santa is creepy. he breaks into your house at night??? omg… how do you explain to your kids that there is a santa on every corner and you shouldn’t trust that santa won’t murder you (because he’s not real)?
it is creepy, but that’s analogous to jesus
They do. Though parents tend to treat Santa as non-fiction, and do things like fabricate evidence and make up explanations for how Santa is real.
And definitely a lot of kids definitively believe in Santa, in a way that they don’t believe in books and movies and pretends.
Kids also LOVE to play Santa / move the elf after they find out and there are still younger siblings in the house. It’s a make believe game that hurts no one.
Yeah, I don’t think it’s harmful, just dishonest.
I don’t think make-believe is fundamentally dishonest. It’s more like fiction.
To me, “make-believe” refers to a game where everyone knows that they are playing pretend.
When some do not, it’s more like an elaborate conspiracy built on lies.
My kid loves playing pretend. But it’s not the same activity as the stuff I listed above.
For the stuff I listed above (Santa, Mary, Jesus, Witchcraft, Fairies, etc.) the truth-value of the idea is a legitimate concern. She doesn’t focus on them being “real”, but their reality is part of why they are exciting.
Again, I don’t think it’s wrong. I don’t subscribe to “never, ever, ever, lie to kids”, but it makes sense to include Santa, imo.
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Behavioral expectations are the same year-round and not dependent upon “costs” or “presents”.
To illustrate: We might’ve bought tickets to an amusement park; but if a kid mis-behaves, that kid and a parent/adult relative leave.
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First, I don’t hate the idea of Santa.
- I’m pretty sure I believed and enjoyed believing when I was very young. I know I believed at 4 and 5. I remember trying to stay up and hear Santa’s sleigh on the roof when I was 7, but I don’t remember if I was just pretending or if I wanted to believe.
C. I just didn’t want Santa to be a big deal for my kids. My mom never said much about it. She just wrote names on our gifts and not who they were from. She let us draw our own conclusions and didn’t confirm or deny if our Santa theories were correct. She never had to ask us to play along for the younger siblings. We just somehow knew to do it.
Fourth, I didn’t want to tell my kid there was no Santa. When she asked I said what do you think. But she kept insisting on knowing if I “believed”. So finally I told her about St. Nicholas and talked to her about the “spirit of Christmas”. And that’s when she told me I wouldn’t get any presents bc I didn’t “believe”.
5th, I don’t know why I’m defending myself on here for something that happened 20 years ago.
(f) Christmas is not about Santa!!!
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vii) Let’s not forget the “turn-about-is-fair-play” of continuing to “believe” (around age 10 or 11) in order to get a couple more presents.