Also no offense. Asian kids seem a lot more attentive in taking care of their parents, and asian parents seem a lot more willing to sacrifice personal joy to make sure their kids have a good future. So get out of here with that fear and no love no respect nonsense.
Well it depends on why itâs inappropriate. If the only person around is you and the only negative effect is force than I am skeptical that the behaviour was inappropriate.
Sounds like colonel smoothie disagrees
yet he reaps the benefit.
I think that this also brings to bear that the disciplinary consequences should be ânaturalâ to the potential real consequence. I didnât spank my kids for every misbehavior; but behaviors/actions that could result in injury would receive the swat. Direct disobedience (for example, I told my son to not touch the TV, and he defiantly did it anyway) would also result in the swat.
But knowing what the child wants is also an important key. If my kids were looking to go to Six Flags and we get inside and they start to misbehave, they get one chance to correct their behavior. Failure to correct resulted in immediate removal of the offending child from the park to sit in the car (with a parent) until the other(s) were done.
The âarduousnessâ is still there . . . itâs just a matter of when itâs performed.
I donât think youâre at liberty to judge someone elses feelings on their upbringing
Thatâs the thing though. Here in America we can pretty much disobey anyone. Is he going to have to keep obeying you into adulthood?
I donât need to judge. The stats speak for itself. Asians vastly outperform other races.
ITA, but failure to have adequate disciplining processes (on all kids under your authority) will also destroy respect.
These are the swats I wish I hadnât given. In retrospect, I think itâs a bad lesson.
1 Like
Iâm not sure you can just lump one individual experience in with all asians and claim their parents were good parents when the kid claims they sucked.
Although i guess cs is doing that too.
Letâs not talk about individual experience then.
Asians live above me. Never heard anything at all sounding like the kid gets hit. Do all asian kids get hit?
No but it was very common in the 90s. There were a few non abused Asian kids who were very successful and that solidified my belief against tiger parenting.
not anymore. even in asia a lot of that is outlawed now.
1 Like
I did this when the kids were young, but always prefaced it with a warning and then a reminder of the consequences. Only after both did they get a tap on the bottom.
That lasted until I asked the question âIâve told you not to do this. You did it again. Do you remember what happens if you do it again after I ask you not to?â.
And they responded âYou hit me?â.
That was the end of any sort of corporal punishment in our house. And while no lasting damage, yeah, I regret it too. it was a mistake, if well intentioned at the time.
1 Like
If it is getting outlawed, you donât think thatâs a sign that many asian kids grew up to realize this wasnât a great strategy for raising kids?
I havenât been back to asia. I think extreme corporal punishment is looked down upon and outlawed, not spanking. So I donât know. All I know is that asians tend to take care of their parents way more, and they tend to outperform others, sounds like win win.
âUp from spankingâ as in worse than spanking, but âbelow injuries and burnsâ as in not as bad as injury and burns.