If I was a girl I would definitely be gay.
but are you definitely a boy though? 
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One time on the AO, Loner mentioned something about a woman being attractive. Someone asked how he knew - itās not like, as a straight guy, I have any strong opinions on the attractiveness of other guys. Loner pointed out that he spent most of his formative years with the expectation that he should find women attractive. Straight guys didnāt grow up with a similar expectation.
It was a perspective I hadnāt thought of - and may have some tangential relationship to āfemale brainā, but I donāt have time to explore that more at the moment.
You donāt need to be attracted to a person sexually to be able to see that they are attractive physically. This seems like a silly reason.
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Tangent - but what finally clued me in to how to tell which guys were attractive was to think āwould I like to look like that guyā if yes, they are likely attractive.
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Agree.
It always confuses me when straight guys say they donāt know if guys are attractive or that they donāt think much about it. Like, you blind?
Straight girls are much more open about whether or not they think other girls are pretty.
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do you have no idea of how attractive you look?
itās the same ruler
Not really. Decent enough. Unattractive is easier to tell than attractive. Once you hit a certain level, it becomes less clear to me.
I think self-rating attractiveness is difficult.
Another way of putting it is I think I can distinguish a 5 from a 7, but what distinguishes a 9 from a 7 is unclear, and not sure where I would fall in that range.
thereās certainly going to be a lot more disagreement on the 7-9 range, even for girls.
I donāt. I figure Iād be more attractive if I lost weight, but beyond that I donāt know where Iād be on whatever the scale is.
very weird indeed.
maybe straight guys really are wired differently from girls and gay guys
but there are plenty of self-aware straight guys too
I think straight guys are culturally conditioned to try to never ever notice if other men are attractive.
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Are they self-aware, or have they been told by others?
Probably both? But many guys like to improve on their looks. If you donāt even have a bench mark, how do you improve on it?
For example, haircut, clothes, etc. These all make a difference. Itās a self fulfilling prophecy in many cases, but you need to have some judgment as to how you perceive yourself.
I donāt think they are though. Thatās the weird part.
Tellingly, i think, our culture has the phrase āno homoā which is meant to be uttered by straight men whenever they do anything that is perceived as even vaguely implying they might have romantic affection towards another man. Iām not even sure if that phrase is supposed to be literal, or to ironically call out a homophobia already present.
If you never talk about whether men are attractive, then i donāt think you notice whether they are attractive. Unless you are gay, and then your body makes sure you notice, i am sure.
I had the same haircut from age 11 until I was married. Never been into clothes / dressing well. Wife has suggested improvements to my haircut post-marriage, and I agree I look better with the new cut, and she has also shifted my wardrobe choices - also for the better. But without that external push I probably would be rocking the same hair and severely outdated style / comfort-focused clothes.
This. I donāt need to be bi or lesbian to see that Audrey Hepburn is gorgeous and Roseanne Barr is not.
And when Iāve polled guys on the subject they say yes, they can tell that Brad Pitt is more attractive than Paul Giamatti.
Sheesh.