because if you wouldn’t say “boy” in the same context, you’re implying that women are “girls” to you, thus inserting your superiority.
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So it’s okay if females say it? Kinda like black people using the 'N" word? Or the LGBT(QIA?) community using ‘queer’?
i know it’s not that drastic!
Calling a grown adult boy or girl is intuitively demeaning.
If someone calls themself something, that’s usually an indication that they’re okay with being called that (not always). Consent is everything.
That said, you should want to feel weird when you call a grown woman “girl”. It’s weird if you think about it.
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When I was like I dunno 23 or something my group definitely still felt like kids and I think girl was an acceptable in-group noun to use but not okay if it was from an older or younger person not in our group.
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people need to stop finding ways to be offended.
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OK, you got your answer from one of our wise posters here:
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you don’t find it demeaning if someone calls you boy?
no, it is an indication they are comfortable within their circle. No outsider should assume that is consent
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Context.
“Get over here, boy, and bring my beer.” Demeaning.
“That boy [meaning me] over there, wearing the red shirt.” No so much.
Similarly:
“Get over here, woman, and bring my beer.” Demeaning.
“That woman over there, wearing the red shirt.” No so much.
Context, tone and situation can turn many words around…
Boy and girls: children
Guys and girls: males and females.
What’s the opposite of guy? Gal? I think I’d be offended as a woman if a man (guy) called me a gal instead of a girl.
Well, I’d be offended if anyone calls me boy. (except maybe my bf). Heck, I think I’d resent being called boy even if I was a boy.
But this isn’t about what we’re comfortable being called. It’s what others might be offended being called.
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I don’t know about that. My brother’s coworker in a Teams meeting said “Hey can I steal that from you?” about a colleague’s Powerpoint slide that he wanted to use, someone later complained, and he was “spoken to” about his use of the word “steal.”
What about serving a table of black customers before a different table of black customers who were seated earlier? Racist or not?
If this is not racist, then there are legitimate non-racist reasons why Table A (white people) was served prior to Table B (black people seated earlier).
People can see the world as racist as they want to. First thought = racism.
Really??? I have definitely told someone I was stealing something, and had people tell me they were stealing my ideas. To me it always seemed to be in jest, and that’s always my intention when I say it.
I suppose tone and relationship matter. If someone didn’t know me and I told them I was stealing something, that’s one thing. If it’s someone who knows me and knows that I operate in good faith, that’s something else.
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This company has been somewhat comically woke in recent years from things Ive heard. There are more stories in this vein but I don’t want to go into identifying territory.
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I know a guy named Rob. If someone uses the phrase “I’ve been robbed” (usually a sports context) - he would claim that it is a very derogatory term to people named Rob and he requests they don’t use it anymore.
It is fun to watch as people realize he is kidding
Rob sounds like a fun g…man
You were about to type “girl”, weren’tcha??? That woulda been sooooooo demeaning!!!
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pretty sure going for fun guy - fungi
Did you ask any mushrooms if they find it demeaning???
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That is also being overly sensitive IMO. Especially since your brother’s coworker wasn’t saying that the other person stole something, but was saying it about himself. (It would be overly sensitive either way, but moreso given the circumstance.)
Doesn’t change what I said though.