My god how awful. FUCK covid!!! 
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I’m so sorry, Lucy.
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I’m surprised there’s not more publicity about covid-induced dementia. I know in the first wave of covid there was a spike in deaths from dementia, and i bet they were actually covid deaths. And there was that large UK study finding a small but statistically significant reduction in IQ among those who recovered from covid, with greater reductions in those cohorts with severe disease than those with mild disease. People talk about “brain fog”, i guess because that doesn’t sound as ugly as “dementia” or “brain damage”.
My guess is that most otherwise healthy people recover from it, just like most otherwise healthy people recover from a mild stroke. Other parts of the brain are called in to replace damaged bits. But that seems like a fairly major symptom to me, and it doesn’t get much press.
(And fwiw, my mother’s case and my uncle’s were completely unrelated. Different strains, different cities, and he was my father’s BIL, not a blood relative of my mom.)
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Really sorry to hear that Lucy 
Glad to hear you were able to fulfill her wishes though, going through all of that separated from your family sounds awful for all involved
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The hospice social worker said, “soap kills the virus. Go home, take a shower, Wash your hair, Put on a clean mask, and hug your family.” So i did.
My husband also drove me over after she died, to wait for the nurse to declare death, and the funeral home to take away the body. So he’s now exposed, too. Although he didn’t rack up nearly as many hours, and she wasn’t breathing while he was there.
We’d set up one of those portable HEPA filters in her room after she tested positive. (It had been in the living room, in an attempt to protect her from visitors.) I wonder how long something like that takes to significantly reduce the viral load in the air.
I really liked the filter, even though it didn’t ultimately protect her. Her place was strangely dusty, and the air smelled better after i set it up.
(She probably caught it from her aid, who was very close to her. A filter nearby is irrelevant when you are kissing and hugging. So it may very well reduce free virus in the air.)
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Soap is truly an amazing thing like that, just causes mayhem at a microscopic level.
And honestly the filter probably isn’t a bad idea generally. All the dust and things we breath in (probably especially in NJ) can’t be that healthy for anyone.
Truly takes a special person to be a hospice worker though. I can’t imagine, I’d get so depressed, and whenever you meet one or hear about them they always seem like incredibly sympathetic people.
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I had a relatively mild case of Covid in September, 2020, vaxxed in the Spring and boosted in November.
I have experienced “brain fog” much like I did during and after chemotherapy. It has improved each time with time. But it’s been noticeable enough over the past year for me to consider early retirement, at least from the more technical work I do.
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I think there’s a decent chance I had COVID a little over a year ago and I definitely remember the brain fog and loss of taste. I spent the better part of a week as a zombie on the couch.
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Lucy I am so sorry
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Sorry for your loss Lucy
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Oh Lucy, I’m so sorry.
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Sorry for your loss, Lucy.
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I’m sorry for your loss, Lucy
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My understanding is that HEPA filters were designed to filter out allergens, which tend to be larger than viruses. So viruses can pass through HEPA filters. BUT… viruses tend to be passengers on water droplets and other particles that the HEPA filter will catch. So over time the HEPA filter will eventually catch nearly all of the virus. Meaning your husband probably didn’t face any meaningful exposure risk. Especially if he was also masked when inside your mother’s home.
But it’s not like the HEPA filter is going to neutralize airborne Covid within minutes or anything. More like several hours. So it probably wasn’t providing much protection from the aide, unfortunately.
Oh, even if it was actively removing all the virus from all the air that passed through it, it wouldn’t have protected her from her aide. My hope had been more that it might protect her from the friend who came by to chat, and sat across the living room from her.
Im so sorry to see that Lucy
It sounds like you did a great job caring for her
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I was thinking about your brother quarantining from his immunocompromised partner after this and having to grieve without comfort from them. Another FUCK COVID.
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Terribly sorry, Lucy. Glad you could be there to do what you could, and thankful you were able to get a good hospice team working with her.
Fuck covid.
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this is like one of my top fears of covid. it’s not death. it’s not being able to think. my brain is foggy enough naturally.
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sorry for your family’s loss Lucy.
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