D&D (Pathfinder/etc.)

Love it.

But I can’t imagine doing a 1-hour session, ever! My one-shots always end up as 2-shots… the one time I did one in person I had to level with the players, “listen, we are going to fast-forward through the swamp and you all can long rest before we start wrapping this up.”

However we are all adults setting aside our whole evening, not kids. So makes sense.

It’s scheduled for 3 hours. A not-so-secret reason for this club is to give the kids something to do on a weekend besides drink beer in the woods, so we wanted it to go well into the night.

I thought we’d have 1 hour of prep and then I was worried they would end early, but that was not a concern at all.

Once we get through these 5 I’ve got plenty of 2-3 hour one shots from dmsguild that should keep them going


I finally came back in D&D!

My bard had a run of bad adventures. Getting KO’d multiple times in the same combat, watching friends die horribly, charmed by a succubus, swallowed by a froghemoth…

That I decided he should lose his happy go lucky demeanor. He’s more dark now, more acerbic, bordering on nihilistic. And occasionally suffers from shell-shock induced amnesia.

Which is a lot easier to roleplay anyway. :slight_smile:

Amnesia is great for a DM to f*ck with.

My partner has a character where they just told the DM, they woke up half-drowned with a voice in their head saying “Find me”, and told the DM to do whatever. It’s been great.

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Sounds fun! Reading peoples’ signals in games is just as hard as real life. Probably everyone at the table knows that and appreciates it.

My partner is DM’ing a (5e) 4v4 PvP level 20 session soon and they’re great, but I’m not sure they’re prepared for the tomfoolery that’s about to happen.

First off, please suggest anything that’s broken to hell (without being total cheese, like combining 2 Bags of Holding to send somebody to the Astral Plane.)

My top choice so far is a Chronurgy Wizard with the Alert feat and Metamagic Adept feat (for the Careful Spell), so I have +16 to initiative. Turn 1, cast Meteor Swarm which is 40d6 dmg or half on a save, and (Convergent Future lvl 14 Chronurgy) I can just choose one of them I’d like to fail.

So I’m dropping ~120 damage on every enemy (on fail), with a decent chance to go first but I can pick 2 allies to not be caught in the four 40-ft radii, and probably picking a wizard or similar to take it all.

They can try to Counterspell in which case I’ll just burn an 8th level Counterspell in response. Multiple Counterspells will be an issue, but they still need to cast at 9th level or roll for it. And maybe my party also has counters, we are not coordinating in that way.

I’ve only done one PVP before, and it was on an online forum. One group was setting up some evil ritual inside of a cave, and the good guys had to come in and stop it. I was on the bad guy team. We got to design the cave and set up traps and decide where to hide to ambush the good guys. It was a ton of fun setting up, but unfortunately the group fell apart shortly after the fighting actually started.

Is there a scenario the group is using?

I haven’t ever played anything over level 7 or 8, so I’ve never really looked at what’s available at level 20. Sounds crazy though!

We don’t know the scenario yet. We know the parties are from warring countries in our longtime world, and each has an objective they’re trying to accomplish. They will be secret from each other, but as of now I don’t know what ours is.

Levels 3, 5, 14, and 17 are where characters start to feel massive power increases. I think there was a middle one too, 10 perhaps? Currently I’m rocking a level 6, a 12, and a 16. Just wrapped up a level 5 adventure I DM’d.

I’m ignoring the spell Wish, because although I want it (have never gotten to have it), using it in PvP is just silly. “I wish they were all dead, yay.” In which case DM would probably say, okay, they’re all now demi-liches.

I really like the Dungeon Dudes, check out this one on spell combos, if you are coordinating with your team

[url]Seven Super Effective Spell Combos in D&D 5e - YouTube

Are they allowing multiclassing? no lack of crazy optimized builds out there

Single class, check out the Scout Rogue. Two sneak attacks per round is pretty good.

We actually completed session #1 but didn’t get to finish it and are completing it this Sunday.

I ended up taking my Chronurgy Wizard to level 20, used Time Stop to get 5 additional turns, as part of that I sent a Delayed Blast Fireball into the enemy party (since it doesn’t affect them until released). Following I used Tether Essence on 2 enemies and I’m waiting to use Mental Prison on them for about 15d10 dmg to both of them.

The downside is I’m about to be on 3 levels of exhaustion from using Convergent Future (Wizard: Chronurgy Magic - DND 5th Edition), with an AC of 14 and only 120 HP (which is minimal compared to our lvl 20 Barbarian with ~350 HP, something like 18 AC and Rage.) I’m on 2 Exhaustion currently and our Barbarian is about to be permanently banished to another plane unless he makes a WIS save DC 23… and he has +2 to WIS so it’s literally impossible unless I take another Exhaustion to make him roll a 21. 3+ levels of exhaustion starts getting Very Bad

Also, we just encountered a common Good enemy that is against both of us, who are currently helping refugees escape this warring hellscape, but we need an item they are using for the war effort… and DM has said our actions here (kill everybody not us, cooperate, something in between) will shape the entire world going forward, so that’s a lot to deal with all at once!

For the next month I’m playing in a Muppet D&D adventure. I’m Fozzie the Bard, so I want some jokes / insults that are both D&D and Muppet/Sesame Street (or Muppet Show hosts) appropriate.

Any suggestions, the worse the better?

My favorite so far:
What do you get when you cross our Very Special Guest Star Mr. Steve Martin with a Beholder? Eleven WILD AND CRAZY EYES!!!

Others (all celebrities are preceded by “our very special guest star…”)

What did Carly Simon say when Strahd tried to suck her blood but missed the artery? You’re so vein

What do you have when you find Jim Neighbors in a mound of small humanoids? A Gnome-er Pile!

Which secondary school did John Denver attend to learn stone cunning from dwarven masters? Rocky mountain high

Vicious Mockery Insults:

You were such an evil child Julie Andrews would refuse to be your nanny

Last time I saw someone this angry was when Oscar the Grouch’s trash can was replaced by a mimic

Fozzie the Bard: “You’re about as useful as a dirt road at the exit of a car wash.”

Piggy the Ninja Assassin: “What’s a car wash?”

FtB: “Nothing unless it has some soap and lots of water.”

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Why do rangers always have spinach stuck between their teeth?

Because not all who wander are flossed

What does an armless ranger, a legless elf, and a headless horseman have in common?

They’re all a fraction of their former selves!