You ever go to them coffee shops that seem to have everything but coffee on the menu?
Ima like I wanna coffee and they’re like whaddya mean you want an americano or something and I’m like WTF just give me a coffee.
All I want is a coffee, man.
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Go to better coffee shops. My coffee shop has 5 roast options, plus the frou frou drinks.
They won’t give you a blank stare if you just say “coffee” right
I don’t want anything fancy just give me a coffee when I say coffee.
We should get together over coffee and discuss this. 
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Sounds like your coffee shop has 4 too many roast options for CS.
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He’d be fine – they’d either give him the house blend or say “House blend ok?”
But if walking into a coffee shop and saying “I’d like a large dark roast, black, please” is too complicated for you then you should just get your coffee at Dunk’s or McDonald’s. And if the coffee isn’t at least as good as what you can easily make at home, or they get confused by ordering a simple coffee, then you should go elsewhere because life is too short for bad coffee.
I read that 5 times and I feel like I got caught in a circularity. 
I generally agree though - if you are going to spend money on coffee, it is worth knowing a bit more about different roasts, origins, etc. A large coffee with a bunch of cream can be obtained almost anywhere for a couple bucks, which is fine if your goal is caffeine, but spending a lot more than that at a coffee shop is a bit of a waste.
Why I only get drip coffee at home, work, or traveling.
Like a pair of comedians.
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Alright trying to order coffee at these fancy places is driving me mad. McDonalds is great because they know what a coffee is. I order a coffee and then I get one.
Then I go to this fancy shop and they’re like do you want an americano or an espresso or a latte and I’m WTF I just want “regular coffee” and they are like what do you mean by regular coffee and I’m like dafuq is wrong with you people are guys a coffee shop are not
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I was gonna post an obligatory Sopranos clip, but it’s got a good stretch of NSFW language in it.
Look up “The Sopranos - Paulie tries to order just coffee”.
Timmie’s knew what I meant when I got a coffee
A+ service