If there’s anyone familiar with my position, I would greatly appreciate some advice.
Earlier this month, I was dismissed for poor performance from my job. I had been working at my company for two years, my first actuarial position other than an internship (that had gone fine). My first performance review after seven months on the job was a “Meets Expectations”; a year later it was “Partially Meets Expectations.” The gist of the criticisms was that I asked too many questions about things that had already been discussed, that I was too slow on too many assignments, and that they had to spend too much time checking my work before relying on it. One incident cited involved a dumb mistake I made with a report, where a data paste to a wrong location delayed submission. I agreed with my boss that I had to do better, and I was given a performance improvement plan that involved a list of tasks to complete over the next few months.
I tried to improve on my problem areas and sincerely thought I succeeded to at least some extent. I also competed the task list, and emailed my boss to keep him updated. However, he never responded to that, even when the ostensible deadlines for the tasks passed. I wasn’t sure what to think about that, but he also wasn’t showing up to the team’s weekly meetings, with the explanation that things were busy for his role this time of year. I also believed that the report in particular had been handled well next iteration, as it was submitted on time and without it being rejected for any reason. However about two months after submission, my boss told me that he didn’t see improvement and that there were too many “issues” with the report (we had a consultant who would check the status of reports being worked on and give recommendations/point out problems while it was being worked on) and fired me.
For a while I had been worried I wasn’t learning enough or doing well enough on the job, and now I have confirmation that that wasn’t impostor syndrome. I have two problems. The first is explaining away getting fired for poor performance for potential future employers. The second, bigger problem is that I may simply not be competent enough for this line of work. I don’t know if actuarial work isn’t cut out for me, or if I’m just not good enough for any job involving data. I like to believe that I just have to approach a future job with more concentration and determination and I can pull it off, but I’m not sure of that, and I think two firings would be the end.
The debits here are that I’ve passed every preliminary exam, the VEE’s, and the APC. However, half an hour ago I got word that I failed the FAP Final Assessment second time in a row, something that hasn’t made this month any better. Did anyone else have this sort of experience while starting out? If not, can you please give me an honest assessment of what I should consider?