Choosing to leave a place where been treated well?

Current position:

  • fellow, c5-7 years exp
  • been current company 3 years, going to be promoted to deputy to head of division (along with one other person) in c1 month
  • pricing related, speciality lines
  • offered position at a well known consultancy (not big 4), pricing related - c.30 percent increase in base compared to current role and large increase in bonus too. Relative to my upcoming promotion will be 20 percent increase in base

Kind of stuck on what to do, current company have created this role for me basically so feel bad for having to leave. At the same time, feeling not challenged in my currently role and the consultancy seems interesting, tho I do not have consulting experience.

Long term aim is head of pricing or similar or something in underwriting. Not sure consultancy will help with the underwriting route, especially as current role I work very closely with underwriters. The pay however is very tempting.

Any ideas?

First, you’ll have to determine what amount of pay you would stay for.
Then, ask for it, or perhaps 10% higher, for negotiating room.
You WON’T get what the consultant job will give you, but there is a risk of the unknown (new job, will you last and for how long, will you like it, etc.) versus what is known (current job where you’ve been treated well).
The difference in salaries – what you’d accept to stay versus what you’d get if you leave – determines your personal risk premium. No one else’s matters.
And, it’s actuarial in thought process. Quantifying a risk!

Also, when you ask for your increase in pay, do not threaten to leave, and do not tell them (or anyone) about your offer. Not their business, really. That’s a bad look, and the start of a bad relationship with what will eventually be your ex-employer. (And who could eventually be your employer again one day.)

If you don’t get what you want in order to stay, then give your two weeks’ notice and accept the other offer.

That’s what I would do. Others might have their own ideas. Read the rest, accept the best!

I posted on the AO something like this

A 20% raise is pretty much an axiomatic “i’m taking that job” offer for most of us in the donkey pen.

Related to a story where a guy was reluctant bc he liked biking to work at current location or something. I said w a 20% raise he had plenty for a new bike and plenty left over for upscale hay or whatever.

20% raise is a lot. But lifestyle and hours and commute are also considerations.

Another question to ask yourself when thinking about this: what will you do with the extra money? (Remodel the house? Buy a fancier car?) Are the positives associated with that worth the risk of not liking your job? Just a slightly different way of thinking about DTNF’s post.

About two years ago hubby turned down a promotion. We left some money on the table. But he would’ve been miserable if he’d taken it, which just isn’t worth the extra money to us. For us it was the right call, even though it might not make sense to others.

I once had a head hunter tslk me out of applying for a job, when I said I was happy, and it was just for the money

  1. Being happy where you are is huge
  2. Do you feel you are well compensated, and this would just be more?
  3. Adding to it, you seem to have a clear vision and direction. If consulting won’t get you there, it may not be the right move.
  4. What is compensation beyond base?
  5. relocation
    6 Normally I would say to tell your higher ups of the offer and see if they counter, but with another person also being promoted, my gut would tell me the salary is probably locked in
  6. With someone else being promoted, is your trajectory as clear as you hope?

All in all I think you want someone to tell you to stay. Personally, is I was financially sound, I would probably stay


Also, have you ever done consulting? It can be very different from a company job depending on the environment. How do you feel about tracking each hour (or smaller unit) that you work? Does the position have a sales goal associated with it? How is work/life balance?

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big issue as well.

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It’s good to keep your long-term goals, as well as your short-term goals, in mind.

My perspective re “increased salary” is a little different, because I’m older, and recently requested a move to part time basically because I wanted to work less, and was happy to accept less money to do that. That’s not a great strategy for a younger person hoping to climb up the ladder, but it has worked out great for me. You want enough money to live comfortably, but more money isn’t necessarily a lot better.

That being said, not being challenged at work can be a major problem. You need challenges to develop your potential. And if you’ve never done consulting, you will find it educational just to be in that environment. I hated having to track each hour, and I didn’t like the expectation that I would schmooze with clients. I’d like to socialize with people I like, not with people my job hopes to get money from. But I nonetheless value my time in consulting.

If you do jump ship, try not to burn the bridges with your current company. You might want to return in a few years, especially if you like the people and culture of the company.


I think I am well compensated my for level of experience. However, my employer certainly is not a top payer in the market, and they admitted to being an average payer (although I am above AVG at the moment). The promotion has definitely been sold to me as a “this will keep you happy for 2/3 years hopefully” - it’s unlikely I’ll progress much at this firm given many employees have a long tenure, but who knows.

No clue to work life balance but I have spoken to someone who worked at the firm and they did warn that the work life balance isn’t great. However, the upside is the people at this firm are certainly very bright with a lot of ambition which I think will push me. At my current firm however, I regularly do work overtime to keep work ticking along, so it’s not like it’s a 9-5 role currently. It will be hopefully in the future as we are recruiting, but it’ll be 6 months at least until then.

Currently I’m mid/late 20s without any responsibility. I am definitely in a position to put in the hours, but at the same time I do want to start focusing on life outside of work as I had to sacrifice quite a bit so far.