Been caught stealing

…once, when I was 5.

And again today. :frowning:

Was at the grocery store picking up some tuna and a couple of rolls for lunch. went thru the self-checkout line; only two items.

When you scan in the rolls, ithe screen asks how many. Out of habit I entered (1).

But here’s the thing. I lied. I had two rolls.

My mind was elsewhere and I usually only ever buy one roll, so I guess I’m conditioned to just hitting (1) roll.

As I was exiting the store, the lady watching over the self-serve lines asked to see my receipt. Which obviously showed only a single roll paid for.

I had to wait around for 45 minutes for the cops to get there and for them to issue me a citation with a court date of May 12 for shoplifting!

Not really. I explained that I wasn’t paying attention and hit (1) by accident.

They were very understanding. I paid the extra $0.72 and went on my way. A little embarrassed but no worse for wear.




you had me for a second there!

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How embarrassing!

The self-service lady must have stolen the signs from your third base coach

Today it’s rolls, tomorrow you’re knocking over a likker store!!!


I once had the cops show up at my house asking why I drove off with a tank of gas in my truck without paying for it. I swear that I put my credit card in the card reader, but it didn’t properly read, and I filled up and left without noticing that I hadn’t officially payed. I went back and paid, and the cops were OK to let me slide, and they believed - correctly so - that this mild-mannered insurance company employee with no criminal record what-so-ever just had a mental acuity lapse at the gas station 2 blocks from his house.

Now I always ask for a receipt. Even if the pump can’t print one, I walk in and get one.

Didn’t think that was even possible to do with a pump…

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This was back years ago when you had the option of pump first and go inside to pay in cash. Now virtually everywhere, if you are paying in cash, you first go in and put the money down, and they dial in your specific pump to give you your desired amount only.

Translation. I’m so old that I remember when people paid for things with green paper money.


I’m not THAT old and I remember when this was a thing.

I wonder now how a person fills up when paying with cash. If you give them $40 but your tank is full at $38, well, do you get a refund?

But do you remember paying for things with vary-colored paper where you’re expected to put the correct date and a driver’s license on it before being accepted?

Same as it has always been.
Assuming there is someone inside, where you told the person to “put $40 on pump #3.”
That person will give you your change.
At Costco, cash is not accepted for the gas pumps.

So…it requires having to talk to someone, not just once, but twice? Keep the change.


That is your prerogative.

We can still do that here, and up until covid hit that’s what I always did. Partly to say hi to the cashier, douggie’s mom. I did some reading and math tutoring with douggie when he was in kindergarten, gosh, probably 20 years ago so I’d always go in to find out how he’s doing (he’s now a large truck mechanic). She’s told me her name probably three times, but I got nothing. I just say “HI Doggie’s Mom!”.

In NJ, people pump the gas for us!

I’m so old that I had my SSN printed on my checks so that I didn’t have to pull out an ID to use one. We did that sort of stupid stuff in the 80’s.

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If police call you back in for questioning, make sure not to also accidentally confess to murder


white privilege means when you get caught stealing just say “oops” and everything is ok

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Must be due to people like you.

Might want to get the COVID booster before going to jail.

Bobby Brown agrees with this.