Have to agree with the infancy comment to a degree.
From 0-2, its really hard. You basically never sleep. Gets a bit easier after that.
The main issuse with not being around from 0-2 is that you don’t know what their environment was like (nutrition and development wise). This can then show up later on from 2-5. Don’t know how the adoption service would supply this information to you (or if they even do).
I see a lot of this now in the UK because of the pandemic. Many smaller children were cooped up inside from 0-2, and this has had negative impacts on their development due to poorer nutrition and physical environment (lack of socialisation and exercise).
Ehhh I’d say 0-6 months are kinda forgettable. 6mo-9mo are hit or miss
But my kids started walking by 9-10 months and were chattering by 12 months. By 18 months they could count to 10 and by 24 months they knew like 200 words. This is a critical time where you can really teach your kids so many cute things
I would say 12-24 months is such a precious window of time with your child and I wouldn’t miss that for the world. 0-6 months they are kinda just a slug laying around waiting to be breastfed - honestly forgettable period for a father and hell on earth for the mother
I would say by the time a kid is 4-5 they kinda have a decent memory and know what’s going on. I’d probably try and snag a 1-2 year old just because I wouldn’t want them to feel “adopted” and I’d hopefully be able to naturally become their parent rather than identified by my child as an adoptive parent right out the gate
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I usually describe them as aliens but slug works. Kids don’t really become fun for dads, in my opinion, until 9-12 months when they start becoming meaningfully dynamic. Before then it’s just “oh look it’s so cute!”
But I agree, from 9-24 months is a great time I wouldn’t want to have missed.
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